What Kids Say About the Ocean:
CHILDREN Write about the sea. Enjoy.
1) This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles.
(Kelly age 6)
2) Oysters' balls are called pearls. (James age 6)
3) If you are surrounded by sea you are an island. If you
don't have sea all round you, you are incontinent.. (Wayne age 7)
4) Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like
Emily Richardson. She's not my friend no more. (Kylie age 6)
5) A dolphin breathes through an asshole on the top of its
head. (Billy age 8)
6) My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back
with crabs.(Millie age 6)
7) When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds
to cross the ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn't
blow, the sailors would whistle to make the wind come. My
brother said they would have been better off eating beans.
(William age 7)
8) I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their
shiny tails. And how on earth do mermaids get pregnant?
Like, really? (Helen age 6)
9) I'm not going to write about the sea. My baby
brother is always screaming and being sick, my Dad keeps
shouting at my Mom, and my big sister has just got
pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy age 6)
10) Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric
eels can give you a shock. They have to live in caves
under the sea where I think they have to plug themselves
into chargers. (Christopher age 7)
11) Divers have to be safe when they go under the water.
Two divers can't go down alone, so they have to go
down on each other. (Becky age 8)
12) On holidays my Mom went water skiing. She fell off when
she was going very fast. She says she won't do it again
because water fired right up her fat ass. (Jule age 7)